Beyond enough.

In my determination to remain un-medicated, I am going to try some daft things with questionable efficacy – and you’ll see if they actually work because I will stop posting about how ill I am and start talking about having a life. Mental health stuff is a way of life, and I am about to start breaking the rules my brain has created in its vastly excessive attempts to keep me safe, so this is going to be rather tricky and I am going to need all the support I can get. Typing this out to post to a public place feels like a tremendous commitment and that’s why I am doing so, because I need people to know that I really, really want rid of these rules that suffocate me like a hundred particularly itchy scarves worn simultaneously.

As a little starting step, for as long as I remember to do so (realistically don’t expect more than a week or two) I am going to end every blog post with three things I am grateful for or things that made me happy that day. I need to be nicer to myself and stop being angry at myself for being ill. It is not – and has never been – my fault.

So a few things that made me happy today:
1. My dog falling asleep on my feet
2. The sound of my mum clattering around the house making odd noises
3. Waking up to see a cluster of damp, windswept chickens waddling about the garden doing chicken things